"Thank You, good night!!" yelled Steven.

    The crowd screamed as he stepped to the front of the stage to take a bow. Joey threw the drumsticks he used into the crowd and walked twoards the back of the stage. Steven followed him but stopped and did a handspring that caused the audience the scream even more. Steven took a final bow and followed Joey down through a door that led off stage. It was the middle of the Pump tour and everyone was (well...) pumped.

    Steven walked into a room where the rest of the band was. Everyone was gatherd around a cooler where ice cold bottled water was being kept. Tom opened one and guzzled it down pretty quickly. Steven took one and wiped the sweat off his face with his towel. Tom took another bottle of water and opened it.

    Brad closed the cooler lid. "Leave some for the rest of us!" he said. A group of women dressed in the tightest things imaginable walked by the doorway. They caught Steven's eye and he walked out of the room after them. Tom took a drink of his water, a roadie walked by, he had been by before and saw Tom drink a whole bottle in less than a minute.

    He yelled into the room "Thirsty Hamilton?" Tom nodded and took a drink. A man came in, "Okay boys!" he said "Let's go!" he looked around and noticed Steven missing. "Okay where's Steven Tyler?"

    "Find a group of scantly clad women and you'll find him," said Tom.

    Joe took the bottle from Tom's hand, drank the rest and handed it back. Tom threw it over his shoulder and it landed in Joey's lap. He got up to throw it away, hitting Tom in the head with it one his way to the trash can. Tom reached to get into the cooler but Joey smacked his hand which quickly drew back. "Okay were out of here!" said a voice. The band got up and joined Steven (who had lipstick all over him) out in the hallway. The got into their limo to go back to the hotel.

    The next day the band traveled to a sound check. The concert wasn't until the next night. As they drove to the arena they chatted and listened to the radio. Joe changed it to the local rock station which had just gone to commercials. All of a sudden the was a loud guitar note and an announcer came on and said "Coming tomorrow to The Snake Pit a special Mystery band. Who is it? You won't know until you get there. It'll be a band so good it will blow you away." Tickets are ten dollars in advance and fifteen at the door. Get your tickets at 346-YEHA"

        The commercial was over and the band took turns poking fun at it. "Who is it?" said Tom in a mocking tone. "You won't know until you get there" The band burst out laughing.

    "Hey let's go see them," said Steven.

    "The bands playing at six and we go onstage at nine," said Joe "Think we could make it?"

    "I don't know" said Steven "Let's go see if there's tickets left after the sound check."

    The sound check was a relaxed atmosphere since they didn't have to play that night. They started playing "My Girl" and things took off. 45 minutes later it was over and the band got into their limos. They had a day off how would they use it?

    "We're gonna go ask about the band that will blow us away right?" said Joey. Steven knocked on the window that seperated them from the driver, it rolled down. "Yes?" said the driver.

    "Could you take us to the Snake Pit?" said Steven.

    "Of Course!" the driver answered.

    The window rolled back up. Tom reached over and turned the radio up. The station was playing the commercial again. Tom began to make fun of it again. After that the station went back to playing music and as the D.J. said "We got a long block of non-stop rock starting now." It started with "Slow Ride" by Fog Hat. The band jammed all the way to the club.

    The car turned off in the middle of "Paranoid" by Black Sabbath, which had Brad rocking out. The band got out of the limo and went on in.

    Their jaws nearly dropped to the floor when they entered. IT WAS A REDNECK BAR! It was complete with a state flag of Texas, some famous country star's guitar and outfit in a glass case, chicken wire in front of the stage, drunk guys passed out in front of the bar and a jukebox playing "Crazy" by Patsy Cline.

    There was a group of guys in cowboy hats arguing with a couple at the bar. The tallest one threw up his hands and yelled "Well guess what? You ain't got a band!" He then walked out of the bar with the rest following. The lady at the bar began crying and wailed "Oh no! What are we gonna do for tomorrow night?"

    The jukebox kicked off and the band walked over to the bar. Steven spoke "What's this about having no band for tomorrow night?"

    The lady sniffed and said "They quit because we couldn't pay them enough money for the show." She wiped her eyes looked around and said "Sorry we haven't introduced ourselves. I'm Ella and he's my husband Hal."

    Steven shook hands with Hal and said "Hey I'm Steven. That's Joe. Joey. Tom. And-" The jukebox kicked on with "I Walked The Line". Standing next to it was Brad. "And the Johnny Cash fan is Brad." Brad looked up, smiled nervously, waved and said "Hey."

    "What can we do for you?" said Hal.

    "Actually we were gonna ask you about the band playing here tomorrow night," said Tom.

    "We're sorry," said Ella. "I guess we'll have to cancel the show."

    Steven looked down at the floor then his face lightened up and he looked up with a look that screamed 'Eureka!' and said "We can play for you tomorrow night."

    The band burst out of the doors. Steven was strutting and the others just lagged behind. Steven turned around and said "What's going on back there? Let's move! We need to get ready for tommorrow night."

    Tom looked at the others and said "You think we got time to make it for the other gig?"

    Steven paused to think to himself and said "Yeah." He laughed and said "Come on Cowboys! I wanna get me some western duds!"

    They got into the limo with Joe whispering to Brad "Western duds. Cowboys. Yee-Haw."

    Brad answered with "Get along little dogie."

    They went to the local mall where there were tons of women staring at them as they walked by. A girl came up to Joe and said "Are you Joe Perry?" Joe nodded and said "Yeah." The girl fell backwards, she had fainted. Joe and the others slipped away as the girls friends rushed over to help her up. They came to a store that had a sign that said "Cowboys 'R' Us". Tom snickered at the sign. The band went in and began to try on clothes

    After an hour they went to pay for the clothes the girl at the counter stared at them and said "Have I seen you somewhere before?"

    Joey answerd "Well do watch MTV?"

    "Not really" said the girl "My parents won't let me."

    The band payed for their stuff and began to leave when the girl yelled "Hey aren't you Aerosmith?"

    Tom yelled back "No we're the Rolling Stones!" in a British accent.

    Back at the hotel the band got ready for their performance for the next night. Brad was watching something on MTV about a video being banned when the phone rang. He answered it "Hello?"

    "Hey Brad, wanna sing some Hank Williams?" said a voice and they hung up. Brad laughed and went back to watching TV.

    The band arrived at the club at 5:30 and the crowd was pretty big. The sign outside said "Suprise Band Tonight". There wasn't much of a dressing room. Just a couple of chairs, two mirrors, a table, and changing screen. "Nice hat, Joe" said Joey as he took it off Joe's head. He put it on and let out a "YEE-HAW!"

    Hal came in and said "You boys almost ready?" "Yeah," said Joe as he snatched is hat back. The band was lead to the side of the stage. The house was pretty packed. Hal asked Steven "Hey what is the name of your band?"

    Steven laughed and said "Aerosmith."

    Hal nodded then stopped for a second to think "Where have I heard that name before?"

    "Well we've been around for a while," Steven said.

    Hal went out to introduce the band "Well we were gonna have One Mans Trash for you. But they cancelled. We do have a great for you tonight and here they are, AEROSMITH!"

    There was a brief silence in the crowd. The band went up near the stage. It had chicken wire in front of it!

    "You remember 'The Blues Brothers'?" Tom asked Joey.

    "Yeah," Joey replied.

    "This sorta reminds you of it doesn't it?"

    Finally there was light applause. There were drums and guitars up on the stage everything had taken care of for them. They made their way to the stage. Steven saw a girl in sitting at a table he took off her hat and put it on.

    The band went up on the stage, Steven took the mike and said "Good evening." There were a few coughs in the audience. Steven checked the audience out. Mostly males, there were a few women there, and up front was an elderly couple.

    They started with "Back in the Saddle" which got a few cheers from the audience. They played "Big Ten Inch Record" and the audience really liked that. The girl that Steven had taken the hat from kept smiling and waving to him from the audience. This made her boyfriend she was with a little mad. He tried to get her to leave but she pushed him.

    Steven looked at his watch and said into the mike "Well this is our last number... we've got another show to get to."

    They started playing "What It Takes". The guy tried to get his girlfriend to leave again. This time she pushed him into a guy sitting at the table next to them. The guy stood up and leaned over the girls boyfriend. He was a huge guy about 6'7" and about 300 pounds of muscle.

    He took the boyfriend by the neck of his shirt and threw him at a table where five guys sitting. Then all hell broke loose.

    "We're gonna get some action goin' on." Tom said to Brad. Beer bottles began to get thrown at the stage. One guy was thrown onto a billiard table actually scatering the balls to go into the pockets.

    "Eight ball corner pocket." Brad laughed.

    Another guy hit his head on the table where the elderly couple were and the old lady broke her mug on the guys head. The whole time the girl just sat there watching the band, not noticing anything.

    The band finished the song and Steven yelled "Good night!" as fast and loud as he could and they ran off stage.

    "Thank you so much!" said Ella as she hugged the band.

    "You're welcome and we gotta go sorry we couldn't stay," said Steven and they got into their limo waiting out back. Inside the crowd noticed the band stopped playing and they stopped fighting.

    "Good show huh?" Steven asked.

    "Yeah." said Tom.

    "Especially when that old lady knocked the guy out with her beer mug." Brad laughed "Or when that big heavy dude took that little guy and used him as a pool cue."

     "Well I guess we played pretty good." Joe said.

    It was 8:30 and they had half an hour to get to the gig. They were halfway there when a tire popped in the back.

    "Oh great," said Steven. "Now what are we gonna do?" There was no spare tire either.

    Brad looked at the clock in the limo and said "If we run we can make it."

    "Run?" asked Joe.

    They ran all the way to the colliseum and were really out of breath when they got there. The stage manager was waiting for them. It was apparent he was stressed out. "Where the hell have you guys been!?" he screamed. "There are 20,000 people out there waiting for you to play hurry up and get ready! You go on in ten minutes!"

    "Nice to see you too," said Tom.

    They really didn't even have time to change. Brad didn't even bother. They barely had sat down when a man came in and yelled "SHOWTIME!"

    They were led to stage where thousands of people were screaming for them. They came out and the crowd roared.

    Steven was still wearing the hat he had gotten from the girl...

© 1990 by Josie E. Whitford
(it was okay for being written by an 11 year old wasn't it?)