<Johnny- Welcome back to Celebrity Deathmatch. The next fight is a rematch you may never forget!

Nick- That's right Johnny. You may recall the match between Steven Tyler and Mick Jagger to see who had the biggest lips in Rock n' Roll.

Johnny- Steven was brutally defeated by Mick who lashed out the french kiss of death! (cuts to tape showing Steven pumping arm in hospital bed smiling) But Steven miraculsly pulled through how we don't know. (Satan pops in.)

Satan - Hey Steven!

Nick- And tonight there will be a full band face off. The Rolling Stones including former bassist Bill Wyman versus Aerosmith!

Johnny- Aerosmith seems to be the favorite tonight. There seems to be legion of there fans out tonight. (Show people mostly young adults and kids holding signs saying "AeroRocks!" "I love Steven!" "On the 8th day god created Joe Perry!")

Nick- But the Stones have their own supporter her too! (Show old people weakly cheering holding up signs saying "Start it up Mick" "The Stones Rock" "I'm on Viagra!")  Let's go to the ring! (Cut to ring)

Johnny- In the Blue Corner "The Greatest Band in the World" Charlie, Ron, Bill, Keith, and Mick- The Rolling Stones. (loud cheering)

Voice- Stones suck!

Nick- Wait where's Keith?

Mills- Even though we can not find Mr. Richards the fight will go on!

Johnny- And in the Red Corner, often called "The American Stones" and "The American-"

Joey- Could you stop comparing us to British acts? We can hold our own you know.

Johny- Anyway. Joey, Brad, Tom, Joe and Steven. Aerosmith! (loud cheers)

Voice- Aerosmith Sucks!

Mills- Now listen I know no one wants to miss a thing here but keep it a good clean fight and we'll all get some satisfaction. LET'S GET IT ON! (Tom lunges at Bill) (Brad lunges and Charlie)

Johnny- Well this fight has started off quick. (Show Tom kicking Bill in side)

Nick- Tom Hamilton is kicking the crap out of Bill Wyman! (Show Tom's foot going through Bill's stomach)

Johnny- Oh my god Tom's just kicked in Bill's stomach! (sizzling sound) And the stomach acid is on Tom's leg. (Tom pulls foot out of stomach and takes off jacket.Wipes leg trying to get the acid off)

Tom- Ow! The pain! (Bill lunges at Tom) (cut to Brad strangling Charlie)

Nick- Brad Whitford has got Charlie watts by the neck.

Charlie- (choking) Hey man! I loved "Last Child"! (Brad stops for a second)

Brad- Everybody loves that song Charlie. (Puts Charlie in head lock. Flips Charlie over and body slams him.) (Charlie puts head up)

Charlie- (dizzily) No mummy. Don't make me go to school today it's Sunday. (Brad knees Charlie in the head)

Brad- (picking up Charlie) Wanna go round and round? (*note: some of these puns might be intended*) (Whirls Charlie around. Head separates from body) Eww what a mess.

Nick- That's one down! (Show Ron head butting Joey)

Ron- (as he head butts with each word) Well Kramer how do you like the beat? (Joey falls)

Johnny- And Joey Kramer is down. (Ron stands over Joey)

Ron- (laughs evilily) (lifts foot to stomp on Joey's head) This is one train-

Joey- (Jumps up) No puns! (Kicks Ron in the head) (takes out drumsticks from back pocket and holds them up)

Ron- (looks at Mills and points to Joey) Hey man that's gotta be illegal!

Mills- (thinks for a second) I'll allow it!

Joey- (inches towards Ron) You like "Sympathy for Devil"?

Ron- (Nervously) Yes. (Gets down on knees) (crying) Oh please don't kill me! Mick and Keith dragged me into this!

Joey- (shakes head) I can't kill him while he's whimpering like this. (Brad flys in and kicked Ron in the head)

Brad- (gestures for Joey to finish Ron off) There you go.

Joey- Thanks Brad. (Takes drum stick and sticks it Ron's mouth) (Twirls Ron around and throws him up in the air Ron hit's light) (Electrical Sparks)

Nick- And there goes Ron Wood!

Johnn- Two down on the Rolling Stones side. Aerosmith is still going strong. (Show light falling)

Nick- Watch out here comes Ron! (cut to Bill punching Tom)

Bill- Give it up Hamilton!

Tom- (Choking) No Way! (kicks Bill -uh- where it really hurts)

Bill- (Kneels and holds self) That's not right! (Light falls on Bill)

Johnny- Wow! Bill Wyman taken out by his own band member.

Tom- (laughs) Had a little Bright Light Fright didn't he?

Joey- (kicks Tom in head) No puns I said. (Tom falls to the ground)

Nick- The only ones left are Jagger and Richards.

Mick- Let's do this again shall we? (Tonge lashes out) (Steven holds out mike stand and tounge wraps around it)

Steven- Not his time! (Pulls on stand and rips tounge out) (thinking) hmmm....... I got an Idea. (cut to Mick with hand in mouth)

Mick- (mumbling) Give me that back! (Steven walks up to Mick)

Steven- (Holds out tounge) (with fake sympathy) You want his back Mick? (Pulls out super glue and slaps some on a stub in Micks mouth and then on the tounge) There you go.

Johnny- What is Tyler up to? Is he really going to give Mick that deadly tounge back?

Nick- Well Tyler is known for having a heart of gold.

Mick- (With tounge stretched and his mouth gettin caught on the tounge) Gee thanks man your a pal.

Steven- (Looking over his shoulder) Let her rip Joe! (cut to Joe with the other end of Mick's tounge tied to a guitar) (Joe let's go of guitar) (guitar goes head first through Mick's Skull)

Joe- (raises arms in the air) Yes!

Johnny- Well I hope Mick has lot's of sympathy for the devil. He'll be needing it. And Aerosmith has one this match folks. (Rumbling noise)

Joe- (looking around) What the hell's that?

Steven- uh oh. This does not look good. (rumbling noise stops) (cut to entrance with Keith coming in)

Nick- Keith Richards has finally shown up

Keith- Sorry I'm late! I was stuck on the can longer than usual.

Brad- That's gross.

Tom- (getting up unsteadily) (woozily) Did we win?

Brad- Not yet.

Keith- (lights ciggarette) Let's get started shall we? (hacks and runs into the ring jumps up and comes down on Steven knocking him to floor)

Nick- Richards has knocked Tyler down! Could it be the end? (Joey grabs Stevens mike and hits Keith in the head with it leaving a dent.) (The dent fills back in)

Joey- (frightened) Holy- That's- That's unreal man. (Backs away)

Voice- This fight sucks!

Steven- (Lifts head up) Who keeps saying that? (cut to stands show Eminem with hands blurred)

Johnny- Looks like Eminem decided to make it out to this fight. (Stevens rolls away from Keith)

Steven- (looks at Joe) (panicked) Don't just stand there looking pretty! Get him!

Joe- Hey Keith! (Takes guitar and hits Keith in right side knocking off an arm)

Keith- That's weak. (Takes a draw off of cigarette wiggles stub and arm grows back)

Joe- (scared) Now that ain't normal! (backs off slowly) (Brad jumps at Keith knocking him to the ground and begins repeatedly punching him in the face)

Joey- Go Brad! (Brad picks up Keith who's head is a bloody pulp. And begin kicking him and punching him savagely making little grunting sounds as he does)

Brad- (Stands Keith up) (laughs) Let's finish him off.

Keith- (voice distorted) Not so fast. (Body returns to normal form only now Keith has Yellow eyes)

Joey- That's not a good sign right. (show everyone shaking their heads. Tom crosses himself.) (bucket of water appears next to Joe)

Joe- What's this? (takes bucket) (light shines on Joe)

Heavenly Voice- Use the water my son.

Joe- On Keith?

Johnny- What's Joe doing?

Nick- He looks like he's in a trance.

Heavenly Voice- (mad) Yes of course on Keith you see any other of the Stones here?

Joe- No.

Heavenly Voice- Well then use it on Keith! Hurry up! (light disapears)

Keith- (has Steven by the throat) (laughing evilily) Say Goodbye Tyler.

Joe- Hey Keith! (whistles)

Keith- What? (Joe throws water on Keith) Ahhhh! I melting! Melting! I never got to brake the record for most live transplants. (melts into puddle on the floor)

Steven- Man what was in that bucket Joe? (reaches in bucket sizzling sound) YYYEEEOOOWWW!!! (pulls out fingers in fire sticks them in mouth)

Nick- Looks like this fight is over. (bell dings)

Mills- (hold up Steven and Brads arms) The winner is Aerosmith!

Eminem- Man that fight (bleep) sucked! I'm gonna (bleep) (bleep) (bleep) and watch the playboy channel.

Steven- He's really pissing me off! (band runs into the stands and begins punching Eminem)

Nick- Aerosmith is really wooping on Eminem!

Johnny- Well unfortunately we can't watch that. We are out of time.

Nick- Until next time Death Match Fans. I'm Nick Diamond. ( Eminem crashes through the glass between Nick and Johnny)

Johnny- And I'm Johnny Gomez saying "Good Fight! Good Night!!!